Hey There, I’m Just Jill, Writer.
As simple yet profound as that.
This is me coming home to what matters — the words.
What the F*ck am I Writing Today: How To Be Committed
Today reminds me that even though I am a writer…
Today reminds me that even though I am a writer
A published author.
A sought-after collaborator.
A ghostwriter for those who can’t string words together to save their messaging lives.
And even an award-winning wordsmith...
Okay, I’m done tooting my own damn horn…
I can still write sh*t.
Even after more than 20,000,000 morning words written.
To think every-single-word I write will be magical is snort-worthy.
And I know this,
even as it pains me on a day like today,
but do you?
Do you know this?
Or do you understand it as a concept that perhaps doesn’t apply to you?
Or shouldn’t?
Oh hello, lovely Ego… there you are.
Do you honestly think, feel, believe
that everything you do in life,
every step taken
is a touchdown, home-run, praise-worthy endeavor?
For it is and it isn’t.
Ah, the lovely in between.
When you sink into this sweet spot,
So much is possible.
Yet, if you keep searching
for that moment
where it all comes together
into happily-ever-after perfection,
think again.
As I don’t mean to be a downer
but that is a Hollywood,
or is it a Disney,
ending that is but a dream.
A falsehood
that keeps people
unhappy, stuck,
expecting life
to be different
then it is.
To finally get better
when they get there,
when they get it,
when they are worthy
of that happy ending.
Instead of seeing life as simply a series of steps each and every day,
there is this misconception of a finish line,
a destination where someone yells BINGO,
the golden buzzer sounds
and glitter (along with cold-hard-cash) falls from the proverbial sky.
Plus that guy, or gal,
sweeps you off your feet
and plants a kiss on you
that you feel
as a full-body shiver
all-the-way up and down
to your toes...
As they curl…
Hmmm, delicious.
Well, I call bullshit.
And nope,
I don’t apologize
for that bucket of arctic water
tossed on the fantasy-land-of-you
because when you get this message,
when you embody this,
all changes.
When you too call bullsh*t on those fantasy beliefs
that may look divine
through a looking-glass
of rose-colored glasses
but are actually a lie…
Your path forward will become crystal clear.
Just like today is a bullsh*t writing day for me.
And I’m good with it.
See life is about all the mis-steps,
not only the #wins.
It’s being solid, grounded, planted,
rooted firm in you,
in those messy moments in-between.
Being okay with the stumbles,
The words that don’t ring quite right.
Don’t jump off my page in utter delight.
Knowing that you are f*cking enough anyway
and not retreating
not giving it meaning
not reverting back to stories
that have whispered dialogue
in your head
that goes something like...
Loser.
See, can’t get anything right?
What the hell is wrong with you?
What are you? Stupid!
OMG, why can’t I get this.
What am I doing wrong?
Life is out to get me.
I’m so broken.
I hate this.
I suck.
This blows.
I hate my life.
What the hell is wrong with me?
Words that resound on a cellular level and pull a being down, down, down.
Into a quicksand of fear, procrastination, perfectionism, self sabotage, imposture-is-me syndrome…
Ah, I remember those days for they taught me much.
That spiral into the darkest despair.
That oh-so-popular dance, done solo.
You know the one,
Two steps in, rock that beat,
Five steps back, scurry back you rat-tat-tat.
I could have gone this route today,
Dropped this beat,
One as known to me as the passing of time.
And the old me would have,
but hell-to-the-no,
I took a rock-steady beat,
gave it no meaning other than
Hmm, curious, is it not?
When I am curious, I step out of judgement, as the two can not live hand-in-hand.
Being curious, brings me JOY and if you know me at all, you know this is my highest value.
When JOY goes, I topple like Humpty Dumpty who sat on the wall, watching the world go bye-bye-bye, before he took a great fall.
Know thyself and what unplugs your spark and you will solve the riddle of you.
For knowledge of this nature gives you power to never again extinguish your light.
And allows you to understand,
without question or doubt,
that a step forward,
each and every day,
even on those days you want to pull up the covers
or stomp your foot and shout hell-to-the-no-no-no!
Is what rights your very world.
When you catch the fact that the Journey Of You
is actually what brings J.O.Y. into your life
And not from some guru-spouted,
Netflix Original created destination,
you find freedom so luscious, so sweet
you’ll be on fire to hop, skip and jump your way forward,
even on a day such as this.
A day where my first typed words were...
I don’t want to write today.
What an interesting thought, is it not?
Because literally, I AM A WRITER.
And each day, I have a morning routine that sees me pounding out 2,500 words before I even begin my work day. I will write more on this soon.
And writing to me, is so not work.
Yet, today, for some strange twist of fate, I sit before my MacBook Pro and begin to type out words of Know Thyself, a post I was considering, and nothing feels quite right.
I simply don’t want to write.
New.
Strange.
As I can never remember feeling this way.
Ever.
I did not ask why?
I did not bemoan my fate.
I simply kept on typing until these here words came out… For what you read today is what came to me today, on this day of publication.
As yes, I am still a work in progress and love-to-hate the last-minute rush.
And isn’t it delicious that it happens right when I rebranded my site from my name to The JOYful Writer?
Let’s speak to that right there, for suddenly I know myself so well, that to call myself The JOYful Writer, is like Cinderella slipping on the glass slipper made specifically for her delicate foot.
It fits. It works. It’s done.
And that is the magic of making quick, know thyself decisions.
I didn’t stop in judgement and question myself around why retreat from using my own name.
I didn’t make it mean anything.
Instead, I made a choice.
A decision.
Done.
My decisions are based on answering one of two questions
Does this feel light? or Does this feel heavy?
Period.
And this one felt so light.
So free.
So delicious even.
Whereas just 15 months ago, it was such a reach to publish anything in my name.
Just one year ago, this idea would have tormented me with all the meaning I would have given it, all the weight, all it said about me slipping backward – again.
Ah, the angst of it all.
For there was much hemming and hawing, tantrums and …
And now?
Now, it’s just ease.
Flow.
Alignment.
Meant to be.
When something feels right, how can it be wrong?
Now that’s a loaded question if I ever did ask one.
Ah, deep thought for not feeling a desire to write.
And yet, here I sit, writing anything.
Allowing what comes to flow through me.
Because I AM A WRITER.
Period.
And writers write.
Full. Stop.
Crap or brilliance, you be the judge, jury and executioner or one in a crowd of standing-o-s.
See my job is to put words on virtual paper and hit publish…
My work is then done.
If I impact one, I have won.
This is a fun sing-along line I literally live, work, play and coach by.
Just as when a decision is made, my work is done.
There is no need to analyze or question or ponder or step back in doubt.
What if your way of being was to simply step forward day-after-day after day.
Not about getting to the destination first,
for the destination is never clear.
Not even when you are aligned and committed to placing one foot in front of the other.
Clarity comes in the forward momentum of you.
Focus sharpens in the committed actions you bring to the table of your life.
The destination may be a thought, vision, dream or goal but it rarely ends up being the exact thing we aspired to.
Our idea of a destination, goal, end-point is actually so incredibly limited, it’s laughable. And yet, we get so stuck on wanting it at all costs.
When you discover a path to releasing what that destination will look like, that’s where you allow room for magic, for possibility, for play, for JOY.
Focusing on the end point as a curtain-call to happy is a fundamental human mistake…
So human, most get caught in this trap and then spend decades untangling the woven web of self loathing, and all-the-feelings of deep defeat.
When you reach an understanding, an awareness, that really the destination you seek is a wrap, a full-circle journey of you
And actually lies, resides, within, then you will know true freedom.
When you end that cycle of stepping up, stepping out or retreating in
And simply go within…
Well, bells will ring on the cellular level of you and welcome you home.
So imagine for one hot sec, if I’d put down my fingertips, closed my MacBook Pro and decided today just not to write.
Not to honor my commitment to the word count, for that’s what writing is all about.
What would that have cost me? To break my own vow…
What would that have cost you, dear reader, not receiving this message…
Where in your life are you considering not showing up?
Have you once considered the ripple effect of that choice?
If these words have impacted you, leave me a comment and do give them a share so we may spread the message loud and clear.
The message is simple.
Take a step today with grace, with JOY, with ease and simple allow.
I could have easily called it a day and chosen to listen to the voice within of you suck, you have nothing to say.
It’s a quiet voice now, but still there upon a rare occasion…
So consider what you may want to give into today simply because it feels hard or doesn’t feel quite right…
Honor your commitment, if it’s in your highest and greatest good, and you will know when it is, my friend, and when you are just making an excuse.
Those are two very different energies… and all is energy, is it not?
Because in honoring your commitment, that thing you said you would do above all else, you make that internal sh*thead voice smaller and less likely to mess with you in the future.
It’s in these moments of resistance your truth, brilliance, and you can shine out.
When your impact will be truly felt.
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Live Your Most Delicious Life Now, Here’s How (Part 3)
Last week, I shared Part 1 and Part 2 of this series on what I believe is a true pandemic in the lives of so many.
Last week, I shared Part 1 and Part 2 of this series on what I believe is a true pandemic in the lives of so many.
Getting ready to get ready
You know, that way of being where you don’t do that thing you want to do, feel called to do or love to do.
Instead you wait, maybe for permission.
Or maybe to learn that next thing you know will get you there.
Where exactly...I bet you’d be hard pressed to define.
And heck, maybe you’ve been stuck in this way of being for so very long that you have forgotten any other way of showing up…
Have lost touch with your truth
Your default setting.
Your JOY.
So let’s dive into the finale of this series and start with a short recap…
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PART 3
Imagine if you could be childlike in your daily life.
Not afraid to fail.
Not worried about succeeding.
Not seeking approval.
Not concerned with what others may think.
Not looking to and fro wanting to know if this or that move is okay.
That, lovely, is called freedom and is the path to you discovering, creating and living Your Most Delicious Life.
Grab life by the reins and ride the hell out of it,
Boldly,
Beautifully,
Unapologetically.
Because when you do, that’s when you are fully alive.
When you get back to your truth,
Your baby-like roots of JOY,
Of fearlessness,
Of curiosity,
Of all…
Life works.
You may not remember when you took that first step, as a wee-one, but let me just clue you in…
It wasn’t pretty.
It wasn’t perfect.
I was wobbly as hell.
Complete with giggles,
And perhaps a clap of delight.
It wasn’t born out of a need to get it right
It wasn’t done because another told you, you may
Hell to the double no, no no.
It was your birthright.
So you dared
To go big
To play full out.
You didn’t get all up in your head.
You didn’t judge
You didn’t bemoan
You didn’t have a story of why you can’t – yet.
You didn’t have a tale of not enough - yet.
Instead, you screwed it up.
Royally.
Again
And again.
And again.
Until one day, you did it for-real,
rock-steady like,
Confident.
Suddenly you got some Bob Fosse,
All That Jazz,
moves happening
Along with curtain calls
And standing-O-s.
See one day
a leg moved,
independent from the other.
Not planned.
Just happened,
in a moment of absolute flow.
As all good things do, yo.
OMG, if you don’t catch that,
I may have to come to your word-screen
and give you a shake to and fro.
When you allowed
this limb to go that way
that hand to reach out this way,
there was movement
other than rock-a-bye-baby
on the blanketed floor.
And from that space, place, grace…
a rock became a crawl,
a crawl became an unsteady balancing act
upon the balls of tiny feet,
Fat toes curled in
and one day a step forward
and a crash and burn,
bum-to-floor.
Priceless. Brilliant. Beautiful.
There was no looking around for solutions
There was no class to enroll in.
No certification required.
There was no self-critiquing
No feels of failure.
There was a mom or a dad or another,
slightly larger being
there to inspire, model, motivate…
As we naturally learn by modeling,
do we not?
By listening and watching
when we are so equipped
But never judging.
At least, not until we get too-smart for our britches.
And then game over on that #true way of being.
Never first asking
May I pretty please try?
Nope, we go for it.
No holding back.
When the time is right.
It’s not a set time.
This exact moment.
That exact second.
For all baby boys and baby girls.
It’s not choreographed or mapped out.
There is no flowchart
Syllabus
Outline
Ten step – ha! – plan
To follow.
There is a knowing within.
A push as old as time.
And it’s still within you.
To think it is not is the very definition of domestication.
Something we think,
in the West,
is only put upon animals –
by humans.
Simply sink into the fact that you lost touch with your natural knowing just as a dog lost touch with its once-natural desire to hunt, kill, run wild.
But that’s a convo for another time.
As in this moment,
it’s all about the fact
that as a tiny human,
You were once tuned into your #truth.
No, “Oops, you missed it. Times up. You, little one, don’t get to crawl, as you’re late to your mark!”
Nope. It’s so unique,
The path we are meant to take,
to each and every little, slobbering baby...
the perfect time to do that thing,
a beat instinctually known…
And yet as we stop slobbering
and often lose the cute factor
We receive less praise
And more critiques.
We create walls to protect ourselves as
We learn others are watching
And they aren’t always giving Standing-O-s.
As we look around,
With more false-awareness,
We see a reality
That has a harsh judging bite.
And for some we ache
to return to the giggles.
The claps
The praise
The feel good vibes
And so we strive.
We also tend to forget
That the answers are within.
Just as those before forgot
And thus pass down
the teachings they too were taught.
Not out of spite
But from a lack of true-awareness.
That it matters not what another thinks.
That there is no perfect time
to take that first step.
That it matters not if we fall face down
As long as we get back up,
Brush ourself the f-off
And call it a TouchDown.
A TouchDown on the scoreboard of your life.
What if you saw each stumble,
each yard traveled
As a mark, a point
On an invisible board of you.
Not good. Not bad.
A simple dash will do.
For that’s all it is.
Points that can serve you,
Teach you,
Honor you.
Or a mark that deducts
from who you are being
In the eyes of another.
Because you care that they see you fall.
Here’s a secret.
We all do.
Fall flat, on repeat.
We all
Stumble.
Fall.
And more than anyone knows.
And the true grit, message, test is in
How you react.
What you make it mean.
What weight you give that fall,
in the moment, and beyond.
How you allow it to have your back
As you step forward with data,
those points on the scoreboard of you,
as your guide...
Or weight your ass down,
a ball-and-chain,
A mistake,
Error…
OMG, catastrophe of epic proportions that grows and grows and becomes one of many eyes in the storm that is your life.
If you’re ready to let that old-tired, former way of being go, be sure to check out Part 4, the finale of this series, a section that was first published on Elephant Journal on February 9, 2021.
It’s where you can discover just how rewarding is it to...
What follows was first published on Elephant Journal On February 9, 2021.
Take a play from the playbook of your infancy and stop giving what was a moment’s thought.
Take a rule
from the manual of life
we never receive in writing
that literally shouts,
the answers are within.
And run down the field of your life, free.
Play on the stage of your life, with JOY.
Dance as though no one is watching,
and mean it.
As you get one damn shot,
and to waste it, well…
That too is a choice.
To keep getting ready to live it, well…
That now seems silly, does it not?
When my clients ask me, What should I do?
My first thought and response,
Who am I to say?
If you do nothing else this crazy-year,
consider asking yourself
and only yourself
what should I do?
And then do what you hear?
And when you hear nothing,
don’t judge it,
just ask again tomorrow.
Just like you didn’t learn to roll over in one day, crawl in an hour or walk your fine self out of the womb on un-shaky legs…
Now wouldn’t that be one for the medical journals!
You can’t expect that inner voice of you to wake up and shout answers at you like a preacher on the pulpit of your life overnight.
What would be possible if you dropped the need for instant gratification?
What would happen
If you gave yourself grace, space
and spent your time
listening for the answers within,
not condemning
or looking outside yourself?
If you are feeling me right now, I’d invite you to keep reading because this is a pandemic more depressing than the one forcing us to stand 6-feet apart and mask-up.
The choices we make
to play small, stay safe,
to do the thing that will pay the bills first,
learn the skill another thinks is the best path…
That may just be what’s keeping you stuck, unhappy and lost.
And I’m here to say it doesn’t have to be that way.
When I stopped getting ready and instead owned up to what I’m meant to do, the flood gates opened.
I often tell my clients to stop pushing on the pull door of life.
Meaning, if your dream is to write a book the only way that will happen is to sit down and write.
Meaning, if your dharma is to help animals heal, then start today for those needy little furballs are everywhere.
Meaning, if your dream is to make money, then own it and end the talk, the thoughts of poverty and debt, lack and but how?...
All starts with a thought.
For a baby, it wasn’t planned but instinctual. Tap back into that.
No, don’t think about it.
No, don’t ponder it.
No, don’t put it off.
No, don’t sink into those self-defeating thoughts of
who am I to talk about that?
write that?
do that thing?
Imagine if you show up in life
with a little baby-drool
on your chinny-chin-chin
and know with ga-ga-grace
that you are perfectly imperfect just as you are.
I created a video of my own perfectly imperfect journey over the last two years that may just inspire you and show you what’s possible when you simply choose to stop getting ready and instead simply choose to do that thing you so want to do in this life.
What if you had enough confidence to say f-it?
To just stand up
Take that first step,
Or heck, bloody crawl, if need be.
The only thing holding you back is you…
Harsh, but true.
Your thoughts.
You.
Change your thoughts and you change your life.
If you want to see this in action, press play on this video share. It encompasses a now-version and a past-version of me.
See even though I am a writer,
I was afraid to share my words as me.
So many stories of low self-worth,
lack of confidence,
not believing I was worthy enough
to take up space
let alone speaking…
I mean seriously, who was I anyway?!
And then something shifted…
Because I am me.
The only one on this planet.
In this moment.
One of a kind.
And no one can tell me that is an accident.
So, I took a step forward,
and another and another…
And man, have I stumbled
over the past two years
of stepping into the spotlight of me.
And guess what?
It’s been fabulous…
Because in doing so I am creating
My Most Delicious Life.
Can you say the same for yourself?
Leave me a comment and share. I want to know.
And be sure to get on my JOYnotes email list if you liked these words, as I send more of them out weekly.
If this read inspired you, moved you, encouraged you, do consider giving it a heart and a share on your social media channels and tag your friends.
You never know who these words may impact because you allowed them to be seen.
A section of this piece was first published on Elephant Journal and can be found right here.
Photo Credit: Ahmad Odeh @aoddehWhat’s More JOY Worth To You?
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Discover Your Most Delicious Life Now, Here’s How (Part 2)
Login to access or catch the first part of this three part series.
Last week, I posted on social and wrote about getting ready to get ready.
Yesterday, I posted on this topic and how it can hold one back from creating a most delicious life and today I want to pull the thread a bit harder and call attention to the three things that might be sticking points in your life…
If you’re anything like I was just two short years ago…
If you’re anything like the amazing creatives I work with on a daily basis.
You’ll wanna dive in fully.
Missed the first words in this series? Go get your 5 minute read on here. It’s worth starting this word-share at the beginning.
Discover Your Most Delicious Life,
Here’s How – Part 2
It’s time to dive into what I first spoke of last week… a pandemic more vicious than the one we are currently surrounded by.
The claws of this dis-ease come from within… from how we see life, think about ourselves, feel about our situation.
Let’s chat on those three things for a hot second. To sum them up in headlines, they are:
Waiting for Permission, Fear of Judgement and Believing Failure is Bad
Let’s dish on that permission one first. Because it might just be holding you back like it once did me and so many others I know.
Travel back a moment. Way back and imagine yourself…
Sorry To Interrupt, Fabulous…
As It Was Just Warming Into Delicious…
I want to keep this short and sweet as I know you were about to get your read on with my words. And I appreciate that, your time and your interest, which is why I have to press pause for a second.
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If, In 2019, You Told Me…
I’d suddenly be writing, as me, after hiding my skills behind ghost-projects, collaborations and numerous pseudonyms, I would have snort-laughed (in your face) and walked away.
Not because I’m that rude, but simply because to write, as me, has been so far out of my reality of what is possible that it would never have even computed.
See, I’ve spent a good 30 years perfecting the art of hiding in plain sight and I share this because maybe you can relate.
Maybe you too have not stepped fully into your own slice of sunlight, taken complete control of penning your own life-design, perhaps done what others have expected and you’ve landed here seeking something.
Answers… Clarity… More JOY…
Or simply to be entertained by some uplifting words.
Whatever brought you here, thank you for taking the time.
I want you to read my words. All of them... and that’s a new feeling for me.
And dare I say uncomfortable.
Yet, when we are uncomfortable, we grow…
When we find JOY, we expand…
When we laugh, we absorb…
Which leads me to why I’m interrupting your read just when you were sinking into your flow.
Hey there, I’m Jill
And Words Are My SuperPower
I didn’t learn to read words till I was nine… And once I did, and found something delicious to sink into, it was on…
When I discovered my first purple pen… And that I could write words, create stories and share anything I desired…
Well, it was so on that I wrote my first 100-page story in 6th grade, making the teacher wait until I finished the very last line of that very-last-page.
Her words, when she handed the pile of pages back to me a week later… “Never stop.”
Some people say I’m woo woo. Other people say my words changed their life. Read on and decide for yourself.
But hey, don’t take me too seriously…
The Only Question Is
Are You Ready
To Receive More JOY In Your Life?
If The Answer Is Yes,
Join The JOY-Family Right Now.
And when you do, please leave me a comment below so I can say hello!
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Discover Your Most Delicious Life Now, Here’s How (Part 2)
Last week, I posted on social and wrote about getting ready to get ready…
Last week, I posted on social and wrote about getting ready to get ready.
Yesterday, I posted on this topic and how it can hold one back from creating a most delicious life and today I want to pull the thread a bit harder and call attention to the three things that might be sticking points in your life…
If you’re anything like I was just two short years ago…
If you’re anything like the amazing creatives I work with on a daily basis.
You’ll wanna dive in fully.
Missed the first words in this series? Go get your 5 minute read on here. It’s worth starting this word-share at the beginning.
Discover Your Most Delicious Life,
Here’s How – Part 2
It’s time to dive into what I first spoke of last week… a pandemic more vicious than the one we are currently surrounded by.
The claws of this dis-ease come from within… from how we see life, think about ourselves, feel about our situation.
Let’s chat on those three things for a hot second. To sum them up in headlines, they are:
Waiting for Permission, Fear of Judgement and Believing Failure is Bad
Let’s dish on that permission one first. Because it might just be holding you back like it once did me and so many others I know.
Travel back a moment. Way back and imagine yourself as a tiny, little baby…
No one magically granted you the rights to first roll over onto your tummy, then one day push yourself up as you wiggled, rocked and swayed to your own unsteady beat.
You didn’t raise a little hand in the air and wave it like you just did care, internally begging pretty please, may I.
You didn’t wait for a crystal-ball moment from someone outside yourself to say, “Okay son, now’s your time. One-two-three, roll. And all will be well.”
Heck to the no-no-no. You listened to nothing other than a knowing within that now was the time.
Did you catch that?
I sincerely hope so because we have become a people so held hostage by an educational system that may mean well, but fails us on so many levels.
A system that teaches the student to wait for permission before taking a step, going potty, starting an exam, entering a door, even speaking up and having an original opinion until suddenly we are so conditioned to wait, that we grow up waiting for some unknown force to wave us forward in life.
Here’s the dilemma.
Just like no one gave you permission to roll,
then crawl
then walk...
No one is going to deem
now is your time to succeed.
To do that thing you feel called to do.
To say, you got this!
To give you a gold star after taking your first step.
To wave a reward for achieving the next step forward.
Go back to that moment.
You were untrained in the ways of life,
of society.
Un-educated in how life is supposed to work…
Go back, just for a beat.
Even if you can’t quite remember your adorable self...
Feet in the air,
palms cupping soles,
rocking and coo-ing
in your own happy zone.
You can picture it, if not your own self, can you not?
See as a baby...
you simply found your rhythm.
No struggle. No striving.
First rocking on your back
until suddenly you gained enough momentum.
But never by asking for permission.
And suddenly
you were on your belly.
A new view.
A new balancing act.
Because you dared to follow your own gut.
An endless stretch of moments of you in play.
In JOY.
In exploration.
Listening to no one other than your own self.
Your inner knowing to rock,
To laugh
To raise your head or arch your back.
To inch in a knee.
To check out your own fingers
with glee.
Soon it became
bum in the air,
uncaring of the spectacle-of-you
and not worried in the least
what the larger-than-life people
all around you were doing.
How often can you say you care nothing of what another thinks of you in the now?
When you care about another
over your inner instinct,
you have now entered the danger zone…
Fear of Judgement, number two on our most debilitating list.
I mean, could you see yourself,
as an adult,
not a cute-as-pie baby,
laying on the floor–
in public
for ten minutes straight..?
Uncaring of what others might say...
Or God forbid,
Think.
Unafraid of the judgy looks and whispered words, the points, the stares, the spectacle of you?
I recently did this and it was mind-blowing on so many levels. Read all about it here.
As a child,
you never thought about judging another,
Or another judging you,
until suddenly it was brought to your attention
that you should care.
That burden that comes with a Fear of Judgement can stop us in our tracks.
Allows you to sabotage yourself over and over again until you’re so exhausted you may actually believe you’re a failure.
Sound familiar?
To rediscover the child-like-wonder of not caring what others will think should be the goal…
Not a focus on another tool, service, certificate or guru to listen to.
A rekindling of not caring about the masses, even as the use of social media climbs and influencer status is the dream for so many.
Influencer of what? When you care what others think of you...
Hmm….
Now that’s a shaky foundation upon which to build. More tentative than the pudgy, oh-so-cute, legs that once supported you in your sole desire to roll over, to crawl.
Where is your focus, your attention?
If on what others will say,
that is a sure path to Misery Way.
If on your dream, on you, hmm,
Delicious Drive comes to mind.
There is such freedom in no longer caring what another will think of you because your focus is on your target.
Just as it was as an intuitive, little diaper-clad drooler.
A plan, a mission, a vision and even when you slipped, you got up and did it again…
Because you naturally believed in 100% possible 100% of the time.
When you failed,
To roll.
You hoisted yourself up...
inched your small self forward.
Maybe it was with a giggle of delight.
Perhaps with a scream of frustration.
Possibly even with a look
to the right,
to left,
Waiting for your spotlight moment to shine…
Searching for another to model…
The point is you never stopped…
Hell to the no.
Instead, you did the thing on repeat.
Over and over again.
No blame
No shame
No self criticism of sucky baby.
You didn’t wait for a Monday.
The first of a calendar month.
A new year to start.
And what?
Wash the slate of failure clean.
You had no concept of failure.
Only your ability to do, do again.
To feel happy,
To sink into mad,
To experience frustration,
To play in amused.
To be entertained
To entertain.
The key is you didn’t spend time getting ready to do that crawl,
thinking about the possibility of succeeding
or, gasp, failing.
You never allowed yourself to get sucked into the trap of over-thinking, over-analyzing, looking outside yourself for the path forward.
You took a step,
or a quarter inch in this case
and called it a #win.
Because it was.
All steps are just that,
Wins to celebrate.
To think differently is asinine.
A lie.
And yet Fear of Failure is the third thing we are taught and choose to buy into that keeps us trapped, miserable, less-than.
You simply stopped your cute, quivering lip,
Sucked in a breath,
Pushed your arms up
in a delightful frog-pose
again and again and again.
Until your knees inched in
and your weight balanced
with an imperfect sway
A mini child’s pose,
hence the yogi name.
Sometimes you’d miss the mark
and end up nearly downward doggy-dogging it,
arms outstretched,
slipping slipping…
ahhh, splat.
Can we not call that a cobra, dear one?
Not a yogi?
No matter.
You recognize the baby-moves,
do you not?
Even if you do not remember them in your own first goes of movement, they are as natural to each and all as breathing in and out.
And the rewards
of simply doing the thing
a baby is called to do...
Brought the laughter,
The clapping of big hands,
And made your spotlight of failure a delight
not a harsh judging bite.
Imagine if you turned failure into your b*tch.
Stopped giving it your power
but made it your own personal rope course of life.
Fall and simply call it a touchdown.
No judging.
No bemoaning.
No thinking life is out to get you.
Simply one dash,
A bit of data,
Recorded in one column
Of many
That make up the seasons of your life.
You did this as an infant…
That first attempt to stand–
Utter failure.
Yet, you gave it not a second thought.
You gave it a go again and again.
For some it was two attempts to stand…not.
For another it was forty attempts before it took.
What follows next was the same.
A step.
And then a fall.
And for each accomplishment
and splat there is but one dash.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
No weight, power, belief but what you give it.
And as a wee-one,
You gave it nothing more than a JOYful snort.
A giggling laugh.
A clap of delight.
A cry of achievement.
A scream of rage, just for a beat.
A roar of frustration, but only for a quick second.
Then back to your default setting –
JOY.
Imagine if you could be childlike in your daily life.
Now.
Not afraid to fail.
Not worried about succeeding.
Not seeking approval.
Not concerned with what others may think.
Not looking to and fro wanting to know if this or that move is okay.
That, lovely, is called freedom and is the path to you discovering, creating and living Your Most Delicious Life.
And next week I want to share more on just what a most delicious life truly is and how to grab it by the reins and ride the hell out of it.
Because when you do, that’s when you are fully alive.
It’s a Wednesday Words share, Part 3, so book a date with your fine self because after 24-hours, that read will be locked down for the JOY-Family to read.
Or simply invest in your natural setting and add more JOY into your life today. Become a JOY-Subscriber now and access all the words.
It takes 90 seconds and is less than 191 pennies a week. Seriously, what’s more JOY worth in your world?
Photo Credit: Isaac Quesada @isaacquesada
Live Your Most Delicious Life Now, Here’s How
Imagine for a moment if you stopped getting ready to get ready to do that thing that you say you want to do in your life. Have you done that on some small or large scale..?
Imagine for a moment if you stopped getting ready to get ready to do that thing that you say you want to do in your life.
Have you done that on some small or large scale..?
Held yourself back, done all the other stuff in order to finally, one day, do that thing you feel called to do?
….I know I sure have. From busy work to overthink, it’s a pandemic more vicious than the one we are currently surrounded by.
The claws of this dis-ease come from within… from how we see life, think about ourselves, feel about our situation.
Whether it be washing the laundry instead of placing those sales calls…
Cleaning the entire house, even re-organizing the entire pantry, instead of writing that website copy…
Investing in another course, product, class so you can get ready to do that thing you feel so called to do but believe you aren’t yet qualified enough to even start
That book you want to write
but have yet to pen a single chapter, page, word…
The one you think about,
even talk about publishing…
one day…
What if we have it all back-ass-wards?
What if the very act of taking that first step forward is actually the thing that gets you ready?
What if qualification happens when you start?
Yes, there are some fields where you don’t practice your whip-stitch on a living heart without some clearcut training, education and licensing even…
Does one even do a whip-stitch on a heart? Hmmm, tipping my chin with my purple pen, thinking back to Dr. Christina Yang on Grey’s Anatomy, as that about sums up my surgical know-how…
By choice.
But unless your dream is in a career that calls for life-and-death skills, decisions in the moment that are based on a bank of learned techniques that you must master…
More qualifications are not the answer to what ails you.
What if all you’re doing is placing yourself in the spin cycle, on repeat, wasting time getting ready…to get ready…
Because you are afraid.
Terrified you might fail.
Horrified you might succeed – once, then what?
Worried you might be judged.
Scared you may be found lacking.
Petrified that you may fall flat on your face. Splat.
Imagine if all you need do is simply cut through the crap of Excuse Land and do the thing you feel called to do.
How many dresses do you really need to try on before going on that date?
No, girlfriend, I’m serious!
What if you knew yourself so well, loved yourself so flipping much, that you felt solid, comfortable, perfect in anything you put on?
Because let’s face it,
you didn’t wait to look perfect
when you were an infant
spitting up and blubbering nonsense
from your crib or bassinet
or safely cuddled in your mother’s arms.
You didn’t wait to be qualified
or even taught properly
before you took that first
unflattering crawl,
as a wee, little one,
now did you?
Even if you don’t remember it,
you did it, friend,
Without waiting for permission.
Because you didn’t go from rolling on your back to running marathons in one leap or bound. No matter how badly you want to be a SuperHero.
Words are my SuperPower, I so get you!
And chances are, everyone thought that crawl of yours was utterly amazing, even if it did potentially start off shaky as hell and end in falling-failure.
When we can let go of three misconceptions our lives become so much easier and more enjoyable, in my most humble opinion.
And this is what I’ll be dishing on during next week’s Wednesday Words.
So make a date with your fine self and calendar your read time now.
And hey, sunshine, if you know it’s time to stop getting ready and start doing, book your coaching call with me today because it’s all about who you are JOYfully being as you start a-stepping…
Isn’t it time you step into your purpose, your passion, your truth today? Just saying!
Photo Credit: Jukan Tateisi @tateisimikito